


The Cheesecake Headache

by writeringoodfaith



Series: Love Square One-Shots [3]
Category: Miraculous Ladybug
Genre: Adrienette (Miraculous Ladybug), Akuma Battle, Beta-read by Captain_Meowvel, Complete, F/M, Gift Fic, Hopeless Adrien Agreste, Marichat (Miraculous Ladybug), Marichat Freudian Slips, Marinette's Birthday, One-Shot, Prompt Fic, Reveal, Romance/Humour, Slight Ladynoir (Miraculous Ladybug), The Cheesiest Cake for the Cheesiest Fic, puns galore
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-21
Updated: 2020-05-21
Packaged: 2021-03-02 20:22:29
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,425
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24302824
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/writeringoodfaith/pseuds/writeringoodfaith
Summary: The only way Adrien could keep Plagg away from Marinette’s birthday cake - the creamiest and most decadent cheesecake in all of Paris - was by transforming and keeping him locked in his ring.
Relationships: Adrien Agreste | Chat Noir/Marinette Dupain-Cheng | Ladybug
Series: Love Square One-Shots [3]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1795369
Comments: 34
Kudos: 155





	The Cheesecake Headache

**Author's Note:**

> This story is dedicated to MY VERY GOOD FRIEND, readerbonafide on FF.net. I think you were there for my very first foray into creative writing and now here we are, a kabillion years later - hehe. Happy Birthday, you beautiful soul. If you enjoy the story (which I hope you do) I gotta give credit back to you for coming up with such a fun prompt! So for now, kick back, relax and enjoy the cheesy shenanigans.

The cheesecake had been his idea.

The decadent behemoth was chilling in his bedroom bar fridge.

He first met the mouth-watering cheesecake at an event in London. While Nathalie was preoccupied with investors, he'd snuck a slice. When a little nose had poked out of his suit jacket, followed by a demanding paw, he'd even snuck a second. The server smiled at him with a knowing look upon handing it over and Adrien tried his best to look like he ate two slices of cake all the time.

Cheese and chocolate: a match made in heaven. The cheese was so rich and creamy that even Adrien's cheesed out palate could appreciate it. This was nothing on Plagg, who'd later compared it to a cheese offering that had once been bestowed upon him by a Chinese Emperor, desperate to save his nation. (It worked). And combining the salty, savory sharpness of cheese with the sweet, dark, extravagant taste of chocolate was like an explosion of colour for his taste buds. Dark chocolate stars crowned the cake, while a rich chocolate sauce dripped down the sides like icicles. It was the perfect finishing touch.

So when Alya suggested a surprise birthday party for his very good friend (it went so well last year!), he knew what his contribution to the event was going to be.

It wasn't very hard really, to get a cheesecake shipped across the channel in a timely manner from London's most popular cake shop. Or to make a withdrawal from his growing bank account to pay the exorbitant taxes to get the award-winning cake delivered. Or to not inform Nathalie or his father of any of it.

The moment the cheesecake arrived, Adrien stowed it away in his bar fridge. But the door had barely been shut when Plagg phased right through it.

And it was then that he realised there was one problem he hadn't accounted for. One black, small and mischievous problem.

With alarm, he shoved the door back open and caught his kwami in the act - teeth gleaming and his tiny mouth wide open as he hovered over the cheesecake.

"NO, PLAGG!" he yelled. "THIS CHEESE ISN'T FOR YOU!"

With a loud snapping noise, Plagg's jaws clamped shut. "Excuse me?" He flitted out of the fridge to cross his paws in front of him. "Then why is it in my fridge?"

"It's not _your_ fridge, Plagg. It's mine. I put cheese in it for you."

"I thought so," Plagg concluded, seeming to only digest the end of Adrien's sentence. Like a black little comet trapped in the orbital pull of Planet Cheesecake, the kwami gravitated towards the fridge and Adrien had to stick his hand out to interrupt the odyssey.

" _This_ cheese isn't for _you_."

"Why?" Plagg's reaction was a cry at the injustice of the universe.

"It's for Marinette."

"...Your girlfriend?"

"You know she's not my girlfriend."

This seemed to fire Plagg up. "She better be the love of your LIFE if you're going to bestow that gift from the heavens to her unworthy palate." Adrien opened his mouth to reply, then thought better of it as he shut it again. Plagg continued, undeterred, "I can't TAKE it! She won't notice if there's a bite missing. Or if I eat a clean half that would also be very presentable. I can eat very neatly. Let me just -"

Adrien could see no other alternative.

"Plagg, claws out!"

The little kwami's grubby paws stopped a hair's breadth away from the cake. He wailed as he got sucked into the ring and Adrien felt the familiar sensation of the transformation washing over him.

He slammed the fridge door shut and breathed a sigh of relief.

That was a close call.

* * *

Adrien sat on his sofa, cross-legged, tail twitching idly. What now? He had to keep Plagg away from the cake. He had to buy Marinette a birthday present. And he had _ninety minutes_ until the party.

He really should've gotten the present earlier but truthfully, he'd been procrastinating.

Last year, his present for Marinette had come to him in the middle of a long shower session. It was the perfect gesture to show her how much he appreciated her own gift to him. And she was such a creative person, it felt only right to attempt some kind of creativity on her behalf.

After his twelfth attempt, he knew he had created the _one_.

Three colours for the beads: two shades of blue, the different pigments kind of like her eyes in the day versus her eyes at night, and a dark yellow alternating on a red string.

It was perfect.

Or at least, Plagg didn't call that attempt an affront to even the colourblind. But a second opinion from his father had proved him right - even _he_ approved of the present!

With last year's gift done so right, how could Adrien hope to match it this year?

Heaving a sigh, he hopped up off the couch, plugged his iPhone into his speakers, and played a previous recording of Mozart.

It had come to this.

He was going to have to hope that inspiration hit him as he shopped.

* * *

It literally hit him.

In a flash of pink clothing and twin pigtails.

Marinette Dupain-Cheng knocked into him as he rounded a corner, and as her bag went sailing across the pavement, he dipped a knee and caught her neatly in his arms.

"Why hello _Purrrincess_." This was _just_ who he needed to do some recon for appropriate present buying. Lady Luck was on his side today.

In his arms, Marinette looked up at him with wide doe eyes, as blue as a perfect summer day - wait, _what_? He pushed those disloyal thoughts from him, a little perturbed at how easily he was comparing his friend to his lady. He lowered his arms and Marinette stepped out of his hold.

She hurried over to pick up her shopping bag, grunting as she heaved it off the pavement. "Sorry for"— she huffed and swung the heavy shopping bag over her shoulder— "running into you, Chat!"

"Well, you have been running through my mind all day."

"What?"

"WHAT?" he echoed, a little too loudly, only realising then that he had spoken out loud. Time to distract her with some good old-fashioned rustic Chat Noir charm. He pulled out his baton to twirl it and then plant it on the floor in front of him. Leaning down on it, he grinned up at her. "Looks like you could use some help, little lady."

"No need, Chat." She adjusted the bag on her shoulder. "I'm done! This is all the material I needed to make a bridesmaid dress."

Adrien's mind drifted back to the four designs she showed him on Instagram. "I'm sure any design you do will be great." He received so many DMs voting between the designs. It took him a couple of hours to properly tally up the count and report it to Marinette. He added, "Does that mean you're free now then?"

She nodded. "I've got a bit of time before I meet up with Alya to help take her sisters to the dentist," Marinette paused to giggle. Adrien noted Alya seemed to have used the same excuse as last year. She smiled sunnily up at him. "They're twins you know, so they're quite the handful."

"Excellent." He scooped her up into his arms and began marching through the street. "I need your help, Marinette. Top secret mission." She threw her arms around his neck to hold onto him better and made a noise of protest as he carried her. "What's wrong?"

She wriggled out of his arms and hopped onto the pavement, almost careening over until he reached a hand out to steady her. "I can walk perfectly fine, you know."

A replay of her crashing into him played over in his mind. And tripping over in the classroom with a trayful of croissants landing on top of her. And tripping down the steps of their high school and into his arms. And knocking into the barrier at the ice skating rink. But she wasn't aware of all the times she had tripped up in front of him outside of the mask.

He cupped his chin, his claws skimming his lips to frame a knowing smile. "I have evidence to the contrary."

"Where?" she demanded. "Just then didn't count! I was rushing, and you came around the corner really fast. Maybe you forget how vulnerable we civilians are when you're all muscular and transformed and -"

"Muscular, eh?" Adrien zeroed in on the compliment. He dropped into a lunge and threw in a flexed bicep for good measure. "I'm glad you've got sewing skills, Marinette, because I am totally _ripped_."

Marinette snorted, rolling her eyes despite the upward tilt of her lips. "What's this secret mission about anyway?"

"I need your help shopping for a gift for my, uh" — Marinette was blinking up at him with those beautiful bluebell eyes, a smile full on her lips — "for...my...girlfriend."

Adrien cursed Plagg the moment those last three words left his mouth. That pesky kwami and his contagious teasing and his subliminal messaging - just - _ugh._

On the other hand, Marinette was the picture of excitement. Her shopping bag hit the ground with a thud as she threw her hands in the air, unleashing a squeal. Grinning up at him she said, "I didn't know you were dating someone, Chat Noir!"

Well, he hadn't known either. But he was now and little did she know that person was her.

A girlfriend and a friend that was a girl.

There wasn't a world of difference between the two concepts, was there? An easy mistake to make.

Out loud he replied carefully, "It's a new thing."

And he shouldn't have been surprised but Marinette was so polite. She didn't press him for any further details. Instead she turned the conversation to the task at hand.

"Secret mission challenge accepted! What kind of things does she like?"

"Normal girl things! Pretty things!" He looked around, trying to locate a typical girly gift. His eyes caught the glass display of a jewellery store and a light bulb went up in his head. Chloe always appreciated, or well, expected gifts like these. "How about a jewellery store?" Adrien picked up Marinette's shopping bag and heard her footsteps shuffle along as she followed him.

A bell tingled to signal their entrance and the shop assistant looked a little gobsmacked at their arrival. Adrien realised that shopping whilst suited up was not the most incognito thing he could do. Surreptitiously, a customer pulled out their mobile phone and snapped a picture. Well, Adrien knew how to deal with unwanted attention. He ignored it.

Strolling into the shop, his eyes were first caught by the earrings section.

He peered over, narrowing his eyes to check whether Marinette's ears were pierced underneath her pigtails. They were! He gazed at the selection of earrings. There was a gold section and a silver section, and hoops and studs were in spinning display cases above the counter.

Gesturing towards the earrings, he whispered to Marinette so as to not attract further undue attention, "Do any of these earrings speak to you?"

She shook her head. "No," but then she hesitated and grinned, "but that might be because I'm partial to my own ones." She flashed him the black studs in her ears. She continued, "But if any stand out to you, by all means."

Adrien peered at them again and then shook his head. Maybe not earrings.

Then he saw the rings. His eyes lit up. Wouldn't it be cool if Ladybug got a matching ring like his? It'd have a ruby in it - to match her suit - or maybe a sapphire - to match her beautiful blue eyes? She'd slip it onto her engagement finger and -

A little cough from Marinette interrupted his daydream. She brought her hand to cover her mouth and whisper, "Chat, if you're new to dating her, you probably shouldn't be looking at rings just yet."

His face flamed as he realised she was right. He bobbed his head once in embarrassment, a hand rising to ruffle the back of his blond locks.

"Ooh - charms!" Marinette pointed out another section of the jewellery store. This time, the store attendant joined them, with a welcoming smile. Cooing over a tiny black cat charm that could be thread in a bracelet or worn as a pendant, Marinette beckoned him over with little hearts in her eyes as she eyed the trinket. "This is so cute!" she squealed. "What do you think? A fitting present from her boyfriend, no?" Her head tilted to the side, "Does she know about your superhero status?"

"No!"

"Okay." She smiled and then dangled the charm before him.

He watched the cat's little peridot gemstone eyes catch the light. She was right. The charm was adorable. But, uh, it would not quite work. Because Marinette wasn't actually his girlfriend. And he spoke the truth when he confirmed she didn't know about his superhero status. Especially as beneath the mask of said superhero was her classmate, Adrien, who would be presenting this very same present back to her in under an hour.

This was a terrible idea, wasn't it?

He was just about to make up an excuse about not wanting to give his girlfriend bad luck when someone tapped his shoulder.

Turning around, he stood face to face with a girl who was maybe eleven years old. Her mother stood a little ways behind her.

"Excuse me, Mr. Chat Noir. My name is Victoire and I am a HUGE fan of yours!" Her eyes lit up with barely suppressed glee behind thick tortoiseshell glasses. "Could I please have a photo with you?"

"Sure," he acquiesced with his trademark grin.

He leaned over to smile at the girl's mother who was holding a phone camera. But his attention was distracted by Marinette, who had moved on from fawning over the cat charm to inspecting a polka dot ladybug charm. All of a sudden, Adrien knew _exactly_ what to get his friend. A Ladybug Charm! Because Marinette was the class's Everyday Ladybug. It was perfect!

Before he knew it had begun, the photo-taking session was already over. He finger saluted his young fan. "Stay miraculous, Victoire!" he called out as she rushed to her mother to inspect the picture.

"What's that you got there, Marinette?"

"Oh, nothing." She handed it back to the shop assistant. "I didn't realise these were so expensive," she said.

Adrien didn't even think to look at the price tag.

For someone as awesome as Marinette, no price was too high for the friendship she gifted him. He held out his hand for her to take. "Come, Marinette. Let's try somewhere else!" He decided he'd lead her to other places and buy another present, maybe some dark chocolates for Ladybug! Just to misdirect her.

But a beam of light shot where Marinette just was and interrupted them.

Chat Noir drew his baton and his mouth fell open as Victoire, the sweet little girl, now decked out in a white supersuit and a red vizor that wrapped around her head, adjusted her glasses with her right hand. From those glasses, a laser beam streaked across the room.

"WATCH OUT!" Chat Noir tackled Marinette to the floor, and when his eyes shot back, the shop assistant had transformed into a statue behind them.

"Who is she?" spat Victoire, that sweet, little girl now a terrifying vision in white. Her gaze swept across the duo, and Marinette let out a squeak. "How dare you look at her in our photo!"

"I've got you, Marinette." He swept her into his arms.

Victoire's mother behind her reached for her daughter, "Victoire - no!" and Chat Noir watched with alarm as she too was blasted by the light beam.

As Victoire moved to follow them, both of the frozen figures of the shop assistant and her mother's heads turned to follow her with their gaze. "I am no longer Victoire! I am Vectora! You WILL keep your eyes on me, Chat Noir! And so will all of Paris!"

"Well, you are making a _spectacle_ of yourself." He carried Marinette out the storefront. With Vectora hot on his trail, he gestured for Marinette to hide with the scampering civilians. "Take care, Princess." She nodded in response and rushed out of sight.

While he waited for Ladybug, he knew he'd have to do his best to take care of the akuma.

Poor Victoire.

He was normally good at posing in photos.

Ducking and weaving to attract her fire away from the civilian crowd, Vectora screeched at him to stand still.

"Nyah," was his response, complete with tongue sticking out. But teasing the akuma almost cost him; he yelped as he narrowly avoided another laser beam that hit the lamp post he had been hanging on.

And like a breath of fresh air, Ladybug sailed into the battle scene.

"The akuma is in her glasses!"

How was his lady so smart? She'd only been in the battle for a second and she already knew what to do.

"Lucky charm!" she called out, spinning her yoyo into the air. A brown vegetable fell from the sky. "An onion?"

Ladybug surveyed the scene before her and a familiar light brightened her eyes. "Chat Noir, quick! Use your claws!" She threw the onion towards Vectora who puzzled over the unassuming vegetable being thrown at her, but like two partners in a dance who had spent their whole lives practising, Chat Noir knew what to do.

He moved into position, jumping from behind Vectora to slice and dice the onion with his claws. As the diced onions fell across Vectora's red vizor, he blinked back tears in his own eyes. Dang onions.

"Ah!" Vectora cried out, scratching at her eyes beneath the glasses. "It burns!"

In response he yelled out, "Cataclysm!" and with his eyes only slightly watering, he swiped at Vectora's glasses. A dark purple butterfly erupted from the destroyed object and with a swoop of her trusty yoyo, Ladybug purified it.

She walked over towards the now un-akumatized Victoire and scooped up the onion pieces. Flinging them into the air with her trademark cry "Miraculous Ladybug!", a swarm of pink magical ladybugs unfroze the affected civilians.

He reached over to fist bump his lady.

"Knew _eye_ could count on you." He winked for good measure.

"Oh Kitty," she giggled. "Your jokes are getting _cornea_."

His eyes lit up. "Hey! You punned!"

"Sometimes the situation calls for it." She sashayed away from him. "Bug out!"

He watched her zip away on her yoyo.

And then he remembered Marinette.

Did she get away okay? Hopefully, right?

He checked the time on his baton.

Her birthday party was in half an hour! Oh no.

He found an empty alleyway to detransform in and a disgruntled Plagg came flying out, a pout on his face and a complaint at his lips. Adrien fixed both problems with a block of camembert cheese. And he flew (as fast as Gabriel designed sneakers could carry him) into the jewellery store, bought Marinette's Ladybug Charm, had it gift-wrapped, and began a light jog towards his own home.

"Plagg, are you feeling up to transforming again to help me get back into my room?"

"What's in it for me?"

"The usual."

His little kwami side-eyed him. "More cheese? It's a deal!"

"Well then, Plagg, claws out!"

* * *

His driver delivered him with the cheesecake and lucky charm present intact to Marinette's surprise birthday party, only a minute before Marinette herself arrived with Alya.

Marinette grinned as she surveyed her friends gathered together in the park and the picnic setup they had created.

"A surprise party? For me? You shouldn't have!"

"Happy Birthday, Marinette!" her friends chorused in reply.

Adrien seized his moment. "This is for you," he called out from behind her, the gift bag from the jewellery store dangling from his fingers as he held it out towards her. She almost tripped on her own feet as she spun around to face him.

He reached a hand out to steady her. And then passed her the gift bag. She blinked up at him, her eyes widening. "For - for me?" she got out.

He nodded and bit his lip. He hoped she'd like the present.

A small gasp escaped her as she opened the jewellery box.

"A lucky charm for our Everyday Ladybug," he declared.

"I love it." Her eyes sought his and for a moment he felt entranced by her sky-blue gaze. The spell was broken when she tilted her head and grinned. "Thank you, Adrien."

He let out a breath he hadn't realised he'd been holding. "You're welcome, Marinette."

And then Max was calling for her attention to help adjudicate a round of musical statues and she was gone. He watched her mediate the dispute between Kim and Alix and smiled to himself. There she was, helping people fix their problems. Always there with a clever solution to save the day. He reminded her so much of Ladybug.

The party-goers were having a lot of fun. After musical statues, they all crowded around the picnic of food Alya's mum had helped prepare. He sat on the edge of the blanket and helped himself to carrot sticks dipped in hummus. Nino plonked himself beside him with a lazy "hey" and together they finished the carrot sticks and moved onto the pretzels. Adrien's attention was then drawn to Alya and Marinette who were standing not far from him.

"Is it dessert time yet?" Marinette asked.

Alya grinned in response. "We've got a treat in store! Adrien got a special cheesecake made and delivered here from London for you."

At hearing his name, he got up and made his way to them. "It's the best cake I've ever had," he enthused. "I knew you'd have to try it, Marinette! Here, let me cut you a slice."

The cake sat in the centre of the picnic blanket, everyone seated around it, and Adrien ambled on over, the girls close behind. They watched with eager eyes as he plucked up the cake cutter beside it and carved out a generously sized piece for Marinette. He noted with satisfaction that the cake was not indeed half missing and breathed a sigh of relief that he'd managed to get his kwami's grubby little paws off of it.

But then Chloe shrieked, gesturing at Marinette's uneaten cake slice.

"Is that a bite-mark there? Oh my god, Adrikins, if you've got a mouse problem my daddy knows the best pest control people in the business."

With a growing sense of trepidation, Adrien inspected Marinette's slice. Sure enough, a tiny kwami-sized bite was carved out in the centre.

Adrien could see no other alternative.

Hanging his head and accepting his fate, he mumbled, "No, it was me." Why couldn't Plagg leave the cheese alone? He probably looked as guilty as he felt, "I took a bite out of Marinette's cake slice."

"Boy, what?" asked Alya incredulously.

Even Nino added, "I know you said this was the best cheesecake in the world, but dude I wasn't expecting you to go this far…"

Adrien tried his best to look like taking a bite out of your friend's birthday cake was completely normal. He put on a smile. It came out wonky.

"Let me just" — he grabbed the cake cutter again — "cut you another slice. I'm so sorry, Marinette." He would definitely scrutinise every inch of this next slice, before passing it on.

But Marinette just popped the contentious cake piece into her mouth.

Chloe's mouth hung open.

Marinette only giggled. She reached up to press her cake-tinted lips to his cheek and whispered, "Thanks, Kitty."

Kitty?

Did she just?

Adrien's head felt faint all of a sudden.

His brain felt sluggish. But wading through its depths images of Marinette and Ladybug appeared. Marinette tripping over her own feet. Ladybug tangling them both with her yoyo. Marinette directing him to use his baton to escape from Evillustrator's cage on a sinking ship. Ladybug directing him to use his cataclysm in battle. And then the two images of the same two girls coalesced into the one who was smiling at him, her cheeks rosy and her eyes gazing at his cheek, which she had just kissed. He pressed a starstruck hand to his own face where she had kissed him.

"M'Lady?" he ventured, just as quietly.

"Mmm?" Marinette responded, the fork again in her mouth as she took a second bite.

With a snap, his mouth shut. He hadn't even realised it had fallen open.

After she swallowed, she brandished her fork towards him, "You and me would be _gouda_ together, don't you think?"

There was no other response to it. Adrien nodded fervently and with the enthusiasm of a thousand Christmases arriving at once, he smothered her in an embrace. She squealed as he tackled her to the ground of the picnic blanket and he laughed. This tableau somehow felt very familiar to him. In her ear, so nobody else could hear, he spoke, "I knew you'd fall in love with this stray cat someday."

Though they were surrounded by their classmates, she turned her sky-blue eyes onto him and suddenly he felt like they were the only two people in the world. A light dusting of freckles covered her nose and as she blinked, he saw the little reflection of himself in her pupils. A smidgeon of dark chocolate coated the corner of her lips and he brought a thumb to tenderly wipe it off.

He continued, "M'Lady is my very good friend Marinette. I can't believe it's your birthday because I just got all _my_ wishes granted." Then he looked at her lips. "But maybe I can think of one more present to give you."

"Oh, yeah?" her eyes danced with delight as she smiled up at him.

That was all the invitation he needed. He bent down to plant a kiss on her lips.

Distantly, there may have been cheers in the background from their friends. Perhaps an "utterly ridiculous!" from another member of the party. And perhaps an "ewww," from inside his pocket. But Plagg could "eww" all he wanted. Because Plagg may have gotten some cheesecake, but Adrien got the girl.

And everyone in the whole wide world except Plagg knew which was more important.

\- THE END -

**Author's Note:**

> THANKS TO CAPTAIN MEOWVEL FOR A+ EDITING SKILLZ AND GIVING ME HER BLESSING TO GO FORTH AND CREATE WHEN I NEEDED ENCOURAGEMENT. 
> 
> And thanks to timezones, which meant that even with a day and a half lost from my deadline due to my apartment flooding, I still made it. 
> 
> Happy Birthday, Readerbonafide!


End file.
